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1 Your friends and everybody else assume you know Kung Fu.
2 Your dad is some sort of engineer
3 You never call your parents to say hi.
4 You ask your parents help on one math problem and 2 hours later they're still lecturing
5 You have a 40 lb. bag of rice in your pantry
6 Everyone thinks you're "Chinese" no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from
7 You've had a bowl haircut at one point in your life
8 Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends' kids
9 You've had to sit through karaoke videos with scantily clad, ugly Asian women attempting to dance and walk around a temple, forest, or library
10 Your parents say, "Don't forget your heritage"
11 Your dad thinks he can fix anything.
12 You know what bok choy is
13 You've gotten little red envelopes of money around February
14 Piles of shoes tend to make it hard to open the front, back, and closet doors
15 You hear (your name + eee (optional) + yah!) every time someone calls you (e.g. Jean - ee - yah! or Mary - yah!)
16 You have no eyelashes
17 Idiot people try to impress you with pathetic imitation Asian languages, like the ever-so-popular: ching chong woo bok chi, etc..
18 Your parents say leaving rice in your bowl is a sin
19 The Bio lectures on marine life (seaweed, sea cucumbers, octopii) was last night's dinner
20 Your ancestors 1000 generations back invented the back scratcher
21 You only have to shave every other day
22 Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 12 midnight to say, "In China (or other native country), we studied even more."
23 Your parents expect you'll be best friends with any one off the street in any given area as long as they are Asian
24 Your parents say, "Calculus? I took Calculus in 8th grade!"
25 Everyone thinks you're good at math
26 Your parents always ask you if you've eaten, even though it's midnight.
27 Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Asia with fuzzy bunnies, vinyl ducks, and English words that make no sense, in great colors like yellow, pink, magenta, orange, and the ever popular lime green
28 You know at least three people named Alan Wong.
29 You never order chop suey, sweet and sour pork, or any other imitation of oriental food
30 "You want a stereo?! When I was your age, I didn't even have shoes!!"
31 People see a bunch of scribbles on a chopstick and ask you to translate
32 You have to call just about all your parent's friends "Auntie and Uncle"
33 You have 12+ aunts and uncles
34 The vast majority of the people related to you wear glasses. Thick glasses.
35 You will most likely be taller than your parents
36 Your parents either make you play the piano, the violin, or both
37 You get nothing if you do well in school, but crapped on if you don't
38 When going to other people's houses, you always have to bring a gift
39 Your parents are never satisfied with your grades.
40 The furniture in your house never matches the wallpaper, the carpet, the decorations, or any of the rest of the furniture
41 You have a piano in the living room.
42 You own a rice cooker or two
43 You buy soy sauce by the gallon
44 You never discuss your love life with your parents.
45 Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrible the weather was in their native country, and how much they still appreciated going
46 Your parents buy you clothes and shoes many sizes too big so you can "grow into it" and wear it for years to come. (haha the size 8 shoes I didn't grow into, and never will)
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Your Icecream Flavour is... Cookies 'n Cream!
Smooth and creamy with a few rough bits mixed in, you are a real treat! You are probably very popular amongst your friends. Remember too much of a good thing is not always good! Don't lay it on too thick!
Smooth and creamy with a few rough bits mixed in, you are a real treat! You are probably very popular amongst your friends. Remember too much of a good thing is not always good! Don't lay it on too thick!
